I lied about my dad raping me..

I lied about my dad raping me..

I lied about my dad raping me because he was abusing my mother and she wouldn’t leave him.

He killed himself when she kicked him out. I’m going insane with guilt.

14 Comments on “I lied about my dad raping me..

  1.  by  ruby42

    My father did rape me and I told everyone he didn’t. He now has foster children that he abuses. My lie cancels out your lie. It will be ok.

  2.  by  sarah

    Ruby42, please please tell someone or help those kids somehow.

    (And original postcard, I understand. I probably would have done the same thing. I’m sorry that he took his life. I was terrified my ex would kill herself because we argued so much and that I would live with the guilt forever. She threatened to commit suicide when we separated and was hospitalized for a while, but she’s really happy now. You can’t be 100% responsible for someone else’s actions and how things play out. Your dad was wrestling with a lot of things, and that was just one part).

  3.  by  Sara

    What that man did to you was awful. He was sick, because he abused both you and your mother. Don’t feel guilt because he killed himself, his demons caught up with him and made sure he couldn’t hurt anyone else. He doesn’t deserve your respect, and you shouldn’t feel guilty for his choices right down to the last.

  4.  by  Towns

    @Sara, It seems pretty clear to me that she made up the story about her dad raping her, so that her mom would finally kick him out.

  5.  by  Jenn

    You did what you had to do to protect your family. There was no saving him, and if he was that diseased that he killed himself, it would have been inevadible anyway. Please don’t hate yourself. You did the only thing you knew to do.

  6.  by  Victoria

    Don’t you dare feel guilty for doing whatever it took to protect your mother. Your loyalty is admirable and your integrity is beautiful. When you have integrity, nothing else matters.

  7.  by  Danial

    Lying about your dad was very wrong. You should talk about this with your mom, or seek professional help.

  8.  by  Amanda

    @Danial: Have you had personal experience with that scenario? Otherwise, leave the judgmental assumptions in your head.
    @OP: Seems to me like you wanted to protect your mom. Good for you, and even though something bad happened, you couldn’t control or foresee what happened to your dad.

  9.  by  Walter

    To be wrongly accused of raping your child must be the hardest thing any father could experience. You are right that you made a tragic mistake, even if you did it with the best intentions. Don’t let your friends tell you you did the right thing, it wasn’t. Don’t let anyone comfort you that your father’s ‘issues’ had nothing to do with you, and he would gave killed himself anyway. You are honest with yourself and take responsibility, good for you. But try to forgive yourself for trying to do the right thing and failing, and if you can bring up the courage, restore your father’s memory, with all its imperfections, even if it risks falling out with your mom and people blaming you. Your secret has been the most painful one I ever read on this site and I wish you all the wisdom in the world to deal with it.

  10.  by  The Good Girl

    Some of us make very grave mistakes in life. Its hard to know what to do when your young, terrified and confused. Maybe he would have gone too far and your mother would be dead. It sounds like you need therapy to let your secret out before you consider telling anyone else. My heart goes out to you..dont give up, please.

  11.  by  Voice of Truth

    Physical abuse is abhorrent. This girls father was completely wrong for abusing her mother. Clearly, her father was mentally ill, and obviously not treating his illness.

    Protecting her mom was/is admirable. Lying never is, nor is accusing someone of such a heinous crime as rape. Don’t agree? I could care less. However, the judicial system agrees. It is a felony to make a false accusation regarding a crime of this magnitude.

    This was her blood too. Her father. You have to wonder what is broken in her to think that accusing her father of raping her is a solution to ending the physical abuse her mother was enduring.

    Making such an accusation hurt everyone. It hurt this girl, it hurt her mom, and it hurt her father. She didn’t make this man kill himself. He clearly had demons that carry the greatest responsibility for him ending his life. However this young woman God help her does have to accept that she carries some culpability.

    Counseling is seriously in order for her. In fact both her and her mom individually and together.

  12.  by  anon

    @walter that is the sanest purest comment i have ever seen. I wish I was a christian so I could say god bless you.

  13.  by  U go girl

    Fuck this son of a bitch u call a dad
    What u did takes courage
    Don’t feel guilty
    Feel proud because u my friend did the right thing
    Peace be upon u

  14.  by  Shane

    You need to be imprisoned. I hope you kill yourself actually…

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