I’m scared to be that girl

The one that gets drunk and has a threesome…. with another girl

I cheated on you

, the boy I want to marry, with someone I dont see a future with….. Because I’ve never been with a guy who didnt hit me, stalk me, compromise me or continuously put me down… the constant happiness made me anxious. Now I realize my issues hurt you just like they hurt me.

I am in love with love

…but too scared to fall in love again.

I’m afraid I’ll end up alone

but I’m also afraid to take the risk

My dad ruined my emotional state when I was young and growing up

I told my dad I HATE him and I have blanked him out of my life. When really I LOVE him more than any of my family who are BETTER to me than he ever was.

Everytime I see the door unlocked,

I feel the urge to run into traffic. I hope I’ll get hit.

I shouldn’t of left you….

Because I most likely won’t ever get you back…. I can’t get you out of my head…..

I’m letting go of all the things that cause me to be unhappy.

right now. and from this moment on, I will be happy.