39 thoughts on “I tell everyone that marriage isn’t for me….”

  1. I completely agree. Being 34 with no children and having never been married… I find myself seeking comfort in words that I don’t believe.

  2. I feel the same way glad to know I am not alone. I too find comfort in the words I don’t always believe.

  3. I tell everyone this as well. My parents have been in love and married for over 28 years, and more than anything I want that to be me, but I feel if I say I don’t want it enough, then I can convince myself I don’t. I won’t be so heartbroken when it doesn’t happen this way.

  4. it’s not all it’s cracked up to be, most married coupes i know end up hating each other or yearning for someone else or losing the love and wondering where it went but never doing anything about it. better off alone. the only thing is that i want kids but would never want to raise them in an envronment without a father..

  5. I have never been able to find a man that will let me have my freedom and be with him at the same time. I am a huge Sex and the City fan and over the years I have come to know and love this quote, “Maybe some women aren’t meant to be tamed. Maybe they just need to run free til they find someone just as wild to run with them…” That is the type of man I need in my life. I believe the fact that I can never find that is why for years I have told myself, my friends and my family that I have no desire to ever get married, be tied down or have a baby. Secretly I wish I could tell them all the truth.

  6. We were brought up to believe in fairy tales…I love my husband very much and NO it’s not a fairy tale…Marriage is a team effort and if you are not a team player then don’t get hitched

  7. I’m only 20… but I’ve never dated, or even held some ones hand. I worry every day that I won’t get married.

  8. Don’t be afraid… The right person is always out there if you’re willing to take risks and go the distance! Your heart is something delicate yes, but it has needs to be fulfilled either way…

  9. This is amazing. I’m independent and I never thought I would want someone when I got older; but now I that having no kids or a husband when your too old or too tired to do anything else and (I) may have nothing else to look forward to in the morning or when you some home from work. Thanks to whomever sent this post secret to make me realize how important family is.

  10. I understand this feeling…. but this feeling led me to marry a very bad person. Marrying the wrong person is truly terrifying…that is what you need to be afraid of.

    I could just weep for every woman who feels the way I did,the way you do. I was so terrified that at age 36 I married a man who has ruined not just my life but my children’s….even leaving him didn’t help. It made it MUCH worse. I have spent the last 7 years in the Family Court .My children (his children too ) are so damaged by the abuse and violence and suffering at his hands they have a diagnosed trauma disorder BUT still the court keeps trying to involve in our lives even though my son has tried to take his own life …….I didn’t know that marrying someone meant that you couldn’t get away even if it was worse than anything you imagined…worse than any nightmare.

    I realise I was happy on my own. I thought I wasn’t. I thought I had to get married and have a family or I was a failure in the eyes of my friends,family and society…I believed I was a failure as a woman unless I was married….I was terrified this “dream” would never happen but what can happen if you marry the wrong person is far more terrifying.

  11. I fear the same thing. I’m 29 years old, and have been dating the same guy since I wAS 18. Nothing but empty promised and unfullilled statements. All our cousins and siblings started dating after us, and they are all married, engaged, or having kids.

    I was always toold I was too fat as a kid and told that I would have to loose weight to get married (no man wants a fatty apparently) and as a defense mechanism I would tell people I didn’t want to get married.

    How is that for irony?

  12. I actually don’t mind the thought of not being married. I have a man I love and believe to be “The One”, and I hope we can grow old together. We plan on having children together, but as for marriage I don’t find it necessary. (sorry to those who religiously believe this to be a sin) Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to have a whole ceremony but just that fact that he loves me and I love him and we both plan on staying with each other as long as time allows gives me more comfort than a potential marriage with anyone who may not be “The One”.

  13. BlueCrimson,
    it’s great that yu have found someone!
    but idk if what this secret talks about is the act of marriage. I saw it as they were afraid that they wuldn’t find anyone for them, like you have…

  14. To #26
    Oh I’m sorry if it sounded like I didn’t understand how this person felt. I do completely because everyday I fear that the one I love will LEAVE me or be TAKEN from me by the forces beyond our control. What I meant by my previous comment was that the person who’s secret is posted should not worry about getting married or telling people that marriage isn’t for them. Instead this person should just live life as happily as possible laughing at the tiniest of things, meet as many new people as possible, fall in love as it comes, and as hard as everyone knows it is try not to look so hard for someone to be with because you never know if that person is right in front of you or just around the corner. I truly wish the best for this person and every person in this world who fears being alone.
    MUCH LOVE TO YOU ALL!!! <3<3<3

  15. Thank you, Poster! I hated being married today…now I’m greatful! I’m just smuthered with love a responsability (3 kids). I’m greatful!

  16. BlueCrimson, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to call you out or anything. I really hope that you have found that one and that things work out for the best for you!

  17. every day i swear im never having kids, or getting married, & this post secret is my life .. im terrified i never will and i love kids, and i want love ..

  18. love (#31),
    It’s no problem, I just wanted to make sure that my meaning was understood. I wish the best for everyone who has commented to this post and especially the person who created this post secret.

  19. I say I don’t want to get married or have kids because I know it’s what my boyfriend wants to hear, and I don’t want to sound like “that girl” who’s only goal is to be a housewife. I’m scared now that he will never propose. I want to marry him more than anything I’ve ever wanted.

  20. i always say im not ready for a serious relationship to my family…its only because idk if ill ever find that love again. i believe i had it once and i let it go. huge mistake

  21. I feel the same way. Sometimes I think I tell people I never want to have children because I really think in my head I’ll never be deeply in love enough with someone to want to have their children. Rebecca (comment #10) I know it’s been forever since you posted your comment but it struck a chord with me. That line from Sex and the City definitely sums up my thoughts. I am terrified of being tied down, getting bored and having a “normal” life that society has rammed down our throat. I don’t want to be a stay at home mom cleaning up dirty diapers and chasing kids all day!

  22. My dad ruined marriage for me after growing up watching how he treated my mom, my sister, and I. I tell everyone I don’t want to get married but the truth is I’m just terrified it’ll be like my parents and my husband will never truly love me.

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