My mom thinks my depression is two years old….

My mom thinks my depression is two years old....



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Comment by catalystenigma
2010-01-21 13:27:24

I’m so sorry. I don’t know when my depression started, but ever since it did, I feel like poop all the time and my mom doesn’t really understand why or what I’m feeling. It gets difficult, but you can do it. I’m trying too.

Comment by Laura
2010-02-09 20:50:02

I agree! That is what you have to keep on thinking. Always have hope even when it seems like its been forever with nothing. No one can truly understand but you. You are the one who will get you out of this in the end (but going to someone who knows what they’re talking about really helps. If you’re not sure if you should, do it!).

Comment by L0L Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 07:42:06

That is about the dumbest shit I have heard. Thinking hopefull does not cure depression. Try fishoil and zoloft faggot.

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Comment by Corine Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 08:38:57

excuse me, but I’ve been struggling with depression for years and years, and thinking hopefull truly does make a big difference. If you don’t beleive things will turn out well, even if you are on meds, if you don’t believe the meds will work, they won’t work. You HAVE to have some hope, sme beleif things will wor out, and that you will feel better.

BTW, please don’t be caling people that name. its a horrible and rude thing to say.

 
 
 
 
Comment by Amoureux
2010-01-21 14:28:42

I had to save your image because it fit me so perfectly. For years I thought about what would happen if I just let my car drive off the side or had someone hit me. Depression is the worst. I wish things would just get easier.

Comment by Patrick Hundt Subscribed to comments via email
2010-01-27 18:40:27

Hi, I hung on for a reason, but I didn’t know what it was- until now. Now I see what it is like to be out of depression and to be fully alive. Some of it was my responsibility – some of it wasn’t. It’s been a ten year journey -ever upward -always a miracle of life-MINE. PS no drugs needed, just a desire to see the other side. I did it. So can you. I’ll meet you there.

Pat

Comment by Emily
2010-02-01 23:49:08

I think some people can do it without medication some people can’t it depends on the person. Their strengths, weakness, and genetics play a lot in the treatment plan that is effective for that person. I would start by talking to a therapist if you’re afraid of meds since they can’t prescribe only suggest. Try different things see what works. I take meds and have for years. I take lower doses than I used to so even with medications you don’t always take them forever. Try what you need as far as therapy and meds go. Best of luck everyone!

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Comment by L0L Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 07:44:43

I’ll meet you there.

If by there you mean a beer factory and a strip joint. Were all the bear is skunked and all the strippers have VD.

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Comment by f.-
2010-01-21 15:11:24

When I told my mom, I said it had been for a year. She cried. It’s 5 years now. I went to a psycologist, and she told me that I should go to the psychiatrist. I told her “see you next week” and never went back.

 
Comment by sadandanonymous
2010-01-22 14:20:36

i pray that i die in my sleep every night. when i wake up, i wish i never did. since i was 12. i’m only 15.

i can’t imagine going much longer like this.

i’m not going to say i know how you feel. i’m just really sorry anyone has to go through anything remotely close to what i’m going through.

i’m so sorry for that.

and i wish you luck. you’re not alone! you can do it.

 
Comment by deathlydreams Subscribed to comments via email
2010-01-22 21:19:05

You’re definitely not alone. And to the sadandanonymous – for the longest time the only time I was happy was when I was dreaming and every dream was a slow build up and fall from a bridge to my death. I would wake up nearly in tears simply because it was not real and that I was still alive. All I can say is to try and take care of yourself… it’s not easy, but it’s something you have to slowly work at. Find someone to confide in. Someone you trust or even a stranger on a crisis hotline because if you keep it in it will only lead to a rock bottom you never knew existed. It’s a rough road but you get to choose the path.

There is so much more help out there if you choose to seek it. I just wish I started it 12 years ago (currently 21 as well).

 
Comment by drgnsyr
2010-01-26 18:55:17

When I was ten I picked my lucky number. I picked four because it was the last time I could remember being happy. By 16 I could no longer remember being four – or happy. I’m turning 25 in two months. To say I’ve never been happier wouldn’t really be saying much. So instead let me say that I don’t think most of the people I know have ever been happier, either. Life is … beautiful.

 
Comment by himynameis
2010-01-31 12:22:48

I’m sixteen, and when I turned twelve I suddenly couldn’t feel anything. The closest to an emotion that I felt was anger, anger at people for not realizing that I was so down, and anger at my parents for not believing me. I felt like a robot, and the one friend that I told this to said that I acted like one too. I tried talking to my family about it and they just said “it’ll blow over.” It didn’t. I dealt with it by just acting crazy, so that people would stop bothering me about why I was so out of it. Eventually at a friend’s house, four of my best friends and I had a long discussion and we all opened up about everything that has ever gone through our minds. Sometimes, talking to someone really is what you need, and you realize that you’re not alone. I began to feel again, and I thank them for bringing me back for my darkest times. It’s been almost two years and I could never be happier.

 
Comment by sassysally Subscribed to comments via email
2010-01-31 20:43:18

You know..I never realized I had depression until my senior year of high school when my teacher pulled me aside and asked me what was wrong. Naturally, you want to deny anything is wrong because its so embarrassing and I felt ashamed to feel that way. I have had depression since I was probably in 9th grade and I am now 22 years old. I have learned to cope with it much better but having depression means having to slow your life down and not take too much on. I used to wonder what it would be like to throw myself over a balcony, believed that noone would miss me, and that i would be miserable forever. Then I found friends that had depression and anxiety too..we have always tried to vent to each help each other through it. Another thing that helps are forums for people with depression and trying to look deep within yourself and discover what makes you wonderful. Its a long and difficult process and its something that is a continuous journey but I hope that you find your way to make it through. Good Luck!!

 
Comment by Corine Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-01 07:00:21

My parents found out about my depression in 8th grade, I’ve been fantasizing about dieing sinse kindergarden, and I’ve felt like a weights been killing me for years and years. I’m 15 now, and in 9th grade. My first vision of dieing or finishing myself off came when I was 5 or 6. I understood death far to well at that age.

good luck.

 
Comment by Emily
2010-02-01 23:43:22

I’ve had depression for as long as I can remember. I was diagnosed officially in my teens. It’s a mess trying all different medications and treatments to find the right one. As someone who is “Recovering” (I don’t believe in Recovery since you can always get worse again but you learn to deal with it better) I can tell you that when you find this treatment plan it makes a world of difference. Don’t give up you can do it! There is a treatment for you! When you find it believe me it will be like night and day and you’ll never go back to being suicidal again. Very sad maybe as we all have bad times but not suicidal.

 
Comment by Danielle
2010-02-03 14:32:34

Depression Sucks. But I found a really cool way of dealing with it…Writing. I write in my diary almost everyday. There used to be some days or even weeks and months that I would foregt, and it realy used to frustrate me, but I always wrote when I remembered. Now it is just habit. Writing and reading back over my writings has helped me so much and I feel so much better these days. Writing is not for everyone, but I think it just helped to have a place where I could always vent my unhappiness and frustration.

Also, I am a Christian, and I am not going to preach to anyone, but I found myself get happier as I got closer to God.

 
Comment by Anonymous
2010-02-06 01:01:18

I’m in the same situation, and it breaks my heart to know that so many people suffer the way I feel I do. I’m currently 21, and I’ve been in and out of lengthy depressive episodes since i was around 12 as well. It took me up until a few months ago to finally ask for help. I’m currently in therapy and taking medication. Like someone else here said, it’s the desire to keep going that gets you through it. Sometimes I feel that desire, but I’m not giving myself a choice-I just have to keep going.
I really hope everyone here has the desire to keep going. I know it doesn’t solve any problems, but know that you’re not alone. I pray that you all find the outlet and support you all need to get through this. Never give up, your life is worth living, and you DESERVE to be happy.

 
Comment by Coykosan
2010-02-08 22:49:36

I’m sorry.

 
Comment by Patrick Hundt Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-10 17:32:25

I did a workshop here in my home town two weeks ago about “Mindfulness”.
It was great. I was able to get grounded and alive all at the same time. I can still feel it and the memory of that feeling makes me smile.
Tonite, I got a message from Bottom Line Secrets<BottomLineSecrets@bls.bottomlinesecrets.com with an article about Mindfulness as a way to stabilize yourself before Depression completely immobilizes you. The article mentions Zindel Segal from the Center for Addiction and Mental Health as the source for the Mindfulness information.

Patrick Hundt

It ain't easy, but anything worthwhile is worth the fight.YOU are worth it.

 
Comment by Lorena
2010-02-11 18:28:25

Just by reading this I burst out in tears. I feel the same way. No one really understands me and no one has really been there for me. At least you have your mom there, but it seems as though mine really doesnt even care i exist. Might as well jump off a bridge right?? NO… i’ll just have to keep going and become the best person I can be and shove it down everyone’s throat and show them how big i have become. No can bring you down. Life is a big fight, a daily fight.

Comment by Patrick Hundt Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-11 19:54:16

Lorena,
I like your spunk! There is no giving up in you. Yeah!
There is no need to “prove” yourself to anyone except yourself. If you take away all the harsh statements aimed towards others and,instead, use that wasted energy on bettering yourself, you will be farther ahead. Prove yourself to yourself. Believe me when I say:Everyone will notice and be amazed. It worked for me and it still is.
Try the Term “get to” instead of “have to”. It will take the pressure off and bring life into a different perspective. The ultimate destination of life is JOY.

Pat

 
Comment by L0L Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 07:58:13

“Life is a big fight, a daily fight.”

Life is something that you accidently exist. It is not a big fight. It is just something that simpily exist. You making up your ignorant little philosophies on life makes you mentally weak. Choosing to live you life in a huge lie. Because your brain chemistry is a bit off. Like you my friend I suffer from “depression.” It has a chance to be cured by taking prozac or what ever shit SSRI you decide to shove down your throat. Or telling yourself everything is alright. Or the combination of the two. Depression is something you can either embrace or make up hopeful little thoughts. Over analyzing everything is a very big part of my depression. I choose to use it for my advantage. Reading up on metaphysics and the life. Ive been depressed for 11 years. Ever since I was 5.

Comment by Corine Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 08:50:46

Depression is a real dissease that effects a lot of people and can lead to someone ending or attempting to end their life. When you talk like that, you don’t know who you are effecting, and if you read your own posting from someone struggling with depression, you could very well have just someones life. Life is a battle, things go wrong and you have to learn to deal with it. Medication has the power to work or make things worse. People who REALLY struggle with depression, they just can’t see things the way you have made it seem. It can make the world seem hopeless and make living a waste of air.

Be nice or don’t comment. I’ve been depressed for roughly 10 years. Life is a battle and a fight, grow up, be kind, if you truly are depressed, help someone.

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Comment by deathlydreams Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-20 13:21:06

You call that person a faggot for “thinking hopeful” and then here you say it can be cured by telling yourself it’s alright or with an SSRI and to embrace it. Way to contradict yourself.

You clearly don’t understand the extent of what it does to people. Maybe, you just don’t see the struggle because you found meds that worked for you or some other form of dealing with it, but for most people it takes far more than a handful of prozac and throwing on a fake smile.

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Comment by Lorena
2010-02-11 18:28:52

Im seventeen.

 
Comment by daphne
2010-02-17 09:26:35

Oh my, i thought i was the only one. i’ve been struggling with depression since i was 14, now i’m 18 and i finally told my mother… i also drive every morning and wish a truck would run me over. it’s terrible to say, but i’m glad i’m not the only one

 
Comment by annabelle
2010-02-19 14:58:40

I know exactly what you mean. I’m almost 19 now and I only really “came out” with this last year… about four years too late. Stay strong lovely <3

 
Comment by Sarah
2010-02-21 05:48:53

I’ve been here too. Since the age of 14 I’ve been dreaming of dying in my sleep. I can’t tell you why it started, I don’t know myself, but it was only when one of my high school teachers asked me what was going on. It’s nice to know I’m not the only person who felt ashamed – I really tried to hide everything I was feeling from everyone. My mum has no idea, and I can’t build up the courage to tell her. I’m 19 now, and I’m living in France and I’m really scared that I’m going to lose myself over here. What keeps me going is knowing that I’m not alone. One day, we’ll all get through this. We can do it, one step at a time x

 
Comment by E
2010-02-21 15:36:28

I’m 17, and I remember thinking about jumping off really tall buildings since I was 9 – 10 years old. In some people it just comes really early, and it’s caused by a number of reasons.
I myself, had no friends at school, and at home I had two parents, one of which frequently hit me, and both of them never talked to me or paid any attention to me. I too wanted to go to sleep and never wake up again.

 
Comment by letsdothis Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-21 16:44:25

I just wrote a long long paragraph about what I’m going through right now but deleted all of it. Because I realize my purpose here isnt to tell you all about my story. It won’t help you. What I can do is tell you to please seek help. Thats hypocritical of me to say, because I’m too afraid to seek help myself. But please do. And know that there is ALWAYS someone out there who cares. Even if you think there is no one, I bet you there is. I know sometimes we make ourselves think that there aren’t. I have parents who care so much about me and best friends and all that, and I sometimes don’t believe any of them care. But please seek help. Think about the last time you were happy, even if it was when you were 4. Do EVERYTHING you can to get yourself back to that. Put all your efforts towards that, make that your life goal, make your life something worth LIVING. Call someone, anyone. Even if its a hotline. Just work, please, work towards becoming happy again. And remember, try and smile at strangers. It could make their day, and perhaps even save their life.

Comment by Patrick Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-21 17:34:20

letsdothis: There is such serenity in your comment. Well written. wonderful judgement Thank you.
A suggestion to those that are struggling, try this phrase: ” I am!”

Comment by letsdothis Subscribed to comments via email
2010-02-22 22:39:40

glad to know i’ve helped out, if only a bit. i called my school’s counseling service today, and scheduled an appointment. it felt liberating (and a bit scary!) to finally ask for help :]

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Comment by anna Subscribed to comments via email
2010-03-15 23:09:31

i know exactly how you feel. ever since my dad was arested in put in jail for raping my sister and me, ive been depressed. he was arrested when i was 11, now im 15. i always think of running away, and killing myself. when im in the car with my step dad .i always hope that we get in an accident, and i die, and he lives. so its his fault im dead. sounds bad right? i know, im getting hep right now. im on medicine. and im cant believeim telling the world this, but everyday seems worse. i become sad for no reason, and i want it to stop.

Comment by Patrick Hundt Subscribed to comments via email
2010-03-16 05:55:42

Anna, You have just taken the first step to taking your life back by writing your comment. Congratulations. Great start!
Patrick

 
 
Comment by Dancing Subscribed to comments via email
2010-03-19 08:08:36

I dream of that too.

 
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