89 thoughts on “I can’t remember your voice”

  1. I will have lost my mother five years ago in march
    I was ten and an only child so it’s just me and my dad now. i took her for granted like many other young children,
    I can’t remember her voice and I can barely remember what she looked like before she got ill with cancer, this broke my heart yet again and I realised how much i miss her and need her with me today, I hope one day I can say to myself “she would have been proud” but I’m scared that I’ll forget her one day and I really don’t want to ever 🙁 I wish I could just tell her how much I loved her

  2. Me too.
    Lately I have been worrying about this sort of thing a lot, and it makes me realise how ungrateful I am towards her and how much I love her and, most of all, just how much I’m going to miss her when she’s gone. Yet I find it so difficult to show her how much I love her, and I don’t know why.
    I miss the days when I would happily call her mummy and hold her hand… at 16 years of age that’s no longer the done thing, and that’s a real shame.

  3. My mom was my best friend my whole life, Im 21 and she is only 17 years older then me. After her father (my grandpa) died 5 years ago, she got heavily into drinking which has resulted in me not talking to her for 2 years now. And she doesnt even try.. This just breaks me heart.

  4. This one brought tears to my eyes.
    It’s probably because one of my best friends
    lost her mother when she was young.
    I wonder how that feels all the time.
    I could never imagine that sort of thing though.

    I’m scared of losing my mom.
    She’s my best friend.
    I trust her the most out of everyone.

  5. My mom died 3 years ago.

    i was fourteen.

    she sang for the church…

    everyone remembers her voice…

    except me.

  6. My mother may not be dead, but she suffered from a stroke in 2008, that left her mute and paralyzed. I don’t remember her voice. That’s the saddest realization I’ve ever came to know. Im 17, and she’s 53…i had her for 15 years 2 months, and outta all the times she talked, I don’t remember her voice. And it kills me.

  7. my mother passed away from cancer that had metastasized from her breasts to all over, one week before I turned 18. This was awful, but even worse for my little sister. I love you sissy, and I miss you mom.

  8. its been 11 months without my mom. im so lost. i am afraid to get graduate from college, get married, or have kids without her. i miss my best friend. 18 years with her was not enough.

  9. I wish i still had the voicemail where you raved on the pain meds for 7 minutes. Even though it wasn’t all you, I would still have your voice.

  10. My mother and I have not seen or spoken to one another in a little over a yea, it all started over a girl I was dating..It progressed from that to the fact that I was on alot of drugs abd finally to the point where I was homeless and she would not let me come home. I am not even with the girl any longer, I am in college and doing great things with my life and I know my mother wants to reconcile but my urge to make her suffer the way I did overpowers my urge to make ammends and I can’t sleep at night because of it. I think I am a terrible person…I hate myself even more than I hate her.

  11. my mom passed away May 30, 2010. she was my favorite person. thank you for this post, im sorry you feel the way i feel. <3.

  12. I lost my mom when I was 18. I watched her struggle for every breath… then she took her last one… i couldn’t save her… it’s been 28 years and I still cry for her everyday… I can’t let go…

  13. My mom died when I was 15 due to drugs & suicide…Ill be 20 next month…I still cry about my mom, I miss her SOOO much!! </3

  14. For those of you who say they cant imagine losing their mom.It happens My mother passed away 11 months ago she was my best friend ..The only one whos on your side and cares unconditionaly..Every day I think of the times i was to busy to take the call or to go over and have a cup of coffee..Now I would give anything to get another hug

  15. My Mother was my world. She had a brain tumor in the speach center of her brain and towards the end she couldnt speak anymore. It killed me in side. After 6 years my father started putting our home movies on DVDs. Not only am I geting to hear her voice, I am seeing me and my mom together again and see what she was like before I was born.

  16. WOW .. Tomorrow will be 29 years since my Mum’s death, I was home alone with her when she died, I was 8… It kills me that I do not remember her voice, or her scent.

    Hold your Mum’s close.. take pictures video, and audio….

    I will always love you Mum… I’m sorry i couldnt have saved you.. but I also know you couldnt of kept me safe while you were living… as my guardian angel you kept me alive, and every day I try so hard to make you proud.

  17. thank you all so much im 19 and my mom died 2 months ago and it almost killed me too. it just helps so much to know that other people feel the way i do and although i still cry everyday i can finally see a little light opening up through the depression. i hope i will never forget her…

  18. It has been 5 years since my mom died. sometimes I can’t breathe because i miss her so much. I would give anyhting to be able to turn back time and tell her one last time how much I love her what she meant to all us kids.

  19. My Mom passed away suddenly 8 years ago. She was also my best friend. She loved me for who I was and never judged me. If I could only have her for ONE more day to hug her, tell her how much I love her, and thank her for all she had ever done for me. I would trade ten years of my life for just ONE more day. Let your Moms know how much you love them before your wish for just ONE more day comes.

  20. My mom passed away from leukemia in 2006. I was 19 years old; she was only 44. This december will be 5 years & i’m already dreading it. I realised within the last few months that I can no longer remember her voice…that’s how I found this page. They say time heals your pain… Such a cruel statement for those of us who know that isn’t true. I will cry for her for the rest of my life.

  21. mymom passed away february 15th 2009. I was only 17 years old when I lost her. I was a drug addict nightmare for most of her last years. I regret so much that I put her through. If I just knew that i was going to lose her, I would have stopped using I swear. why can other girls still have their mom and I cant? why did i get my mom taken away? should i kill myself to prove to mom how terrible I feel? i feel like when i pray she cant hear me..

  22. This made me cry. I lost my mum to cancer when i was 11. And i have trouble picturing her face and her voice. I would give absolutely anything, just to see her once more and tell her that i love her.

  23. This year it will be 14 years that she’s been gone. I’m 22 and I can’t remember her voice, scent, anything..

  24. I completely understand. My ex-boyfriend died last April. I realized recently that I can remember things he said but not his voice. It is always my voice in my head saying his words. I would give anything to be able to hear him again.

  25. I lost my mom when i was 8 and am now 20. I miss her so much and it kills me that i can’t remember her voice but the way i see it is if she really didn’t die and called me after being gone this long i feel i would remember her voice immediatly. I believe its the loss of the voice that makes you forget. if you were to hear it again you would recognize it right away.
    I dream about her every second night still…

  26. I lost my mom 3 years ago after she fought cancer for 2 years. I miss her so much. I can’t remember the sound of her voice no matter how hard I try. If I could have one thing in the world, I would choose to hug my mom one more time and tell her how much I love her.

  27. I lost my mom when I was 6, twelve years ago. I’m still finding out the details of her death, even to this day. I don’t remember anything before then. Things are still fuzzy…the ironic thing is, I’ve grown to hate my father because of the bitch he married…I miss my mom, even though I didn’t really know her…

  28. Hi Lexy, I hope you come back to this page and read this some time. I completely understand where you are coming from. It will 30 years this April 27th since my Mum passed away, I was eight years old and home alone with her when she passed in her sleep. To this day I am still finding out details of my Mum’s death as it just isn’t spoken about  I know how incredibly hard that is. My Dad remarried when I was 17, and I absolutely hated my step mother, she brought her stuff into my home, and took down my Mum’s I felt like she just came in and took over my home! I was always the “Woman of the house” after my Mum passed, and she had no right to take my place the way that she did. Which was how I felt. I left home, as I felt like it was no longer mine. Almost a decade had passed and the ice around my heart towards my step mother began to melt, I realized that this woman.. my step monster, the bitch made my Dad happy, which in the long run made me happy. It took me along time to get to that place where I finally accepted her, and then became her friend. She is now one of my best friends, and I always go to her for advice. I am not saying that your Father’s wife will become your best friend but, take a step back and look and see if your Dad is truly happy. I understand the pain of not knowing all of the details of your Mum’s death, the loss of remembering what her voice sounded like, how she smelled, the way she tucked you in to bed. When you loose a parent at such a young age we only know our parents as Mum and Dad, someone who tucks us in at night, cooks us dinner, we have not had the opportunity to know them as “people” only parents some days I think it makes the loss of a parent easier, and somedays I think it makes it harder. You are not wrong for your anger towards your father or step mother, I do believe it is a natural feeling when someone “replaces” our parent. I am truly sorry for your loss Lexy. I came across a book called “Motherless Daughters” it was a very hard read, but there was a lot of good information in there. May you find some peace as time moves forward.

    Much Respect,

    Another Motherless Daughter

  29. my mum died 9 years ago, now im 17 and i still miss her. sometimes i think i should be over it now. but i dont really see whats normal …

  30. My mom was taken from my family last year by a mentally ill boy who was sexually abused by his own mother, he chose to end the life of my mother instead of his own. I fear I wont remember her voice soon, it has already begun to slip away.

  31. this has touched me more than any other post secret ever. my mom died when I was three and a half and I grew up feeling like I was the only one. thank you for sharing this secret, because with it you’ve reminded the rest of us who grew up without mothers that we are not alone.

  32. I came across this page because I’ve just been crying during the night about not being able to remember my mum and dads voices, but more my mum’s. It will be 10 years since I lost my mum and 9 years since dad. I have my dads voice on tape for a radio interview he had but nothing of mum, maybe the odd word or two on a Disneyland camcorder but I can’t track it down. I discovered the same as many of you have put before- in that, when you are upset you struggle more to hear someone’s voice and because its normally your own voice in your head. I’m 23 now and have accomplished many things I know they would be so proud of, and this probably goes for all of you too. I have always been told I look exactly like my mum which is comforting but I can’t quite remember the things she said to me, her off-key singing and her laugh. I’m glad I stumbled across this site as it has made me feel like I’m not the only girl in the world (literally as I’m from England and the fact I’m using ‘mum’) who feels the same. All the hi-tech modern recording equipment is available for us to use and help our future kids and spouses with any worries in the future. I hope everyone is doing ok. And thanks for your words as I have calmed down and have now stopped crying :). I know its hard sometimes and like me, a good cry occasionally helps the pain, but remember that everything happens for a reason. God bless and Nanight.

  33. Hi my names jade and my dad has been dead since 7 years and I’ve forgot the tone and everything about my dads voice and I want to remember it but I can’t I’ve seen my self awake at 3am trying to remember does anyone know how I could possibly remember

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