35 thoughts on “Everyone thinks I have stopped cutting”

  1. i wish cutters werent so tabu so that they could reach out for help insted of hiding gashes and scars, and having to fight that addiction alone b/c everyone thinks theyre crazy and dangerous. its very hard to fight a harmful addiction when no one knows your secret.

  2. I wish people who weren’t cutters or associated with cutters weren’t so ignorant as to think they have any idea what it’s like. Everyone does think they’re crazy or dangerous, any addiction is harmful, and you don’t see many people doing things like hard drugs publically do you? No, everyone is entitled to their privacy. Just because someone hurts themselves doesn’t mean they want to die. If they did, there will be other signs as well. They just want to be at peace.

  3. I’ve been cutting myself for 3 years. I finally broke down and told my mom. She was disgusted and ashamed of me. She was mad i couldnt stop after a half hour with a thereapist. Her disapproval and disgust broke me down badly. So i did what i do when i feel worthless, i cut.

  4. i’ve recently found out just how many people i know that do or have cut.
    it’s terrifying.
    but what i don’t understand, is how i can care so much more for THEIR wrists than my own.

  5. I stopped trying to hide my scars a long time ago. Well I still hide the new ones, which I hide alot better now.
    But my arms are so marked up it’s very obvious what happened to them. I get so many stares from people I don’t know. But atleast all my friends and most of my family know and accept me anyway. It’s a bit of a relief not having to hide my “shame” anymore.

    I’ve been cutting for 13 years. It’s very very hard to stop. I’m alot better than I used to be though. I went from cutting every day to only about once every 6 months or so.

  6. I did the exact same thing. When people found out I was a cutter, I quit for a couple of months, and when I started again I cut high enough on my arm to be covered by my t-shirt sleeve. Now I wear wife beaters to show them all with pride- the ones on my wrist, my upper arm, and the anarchy sign I branded into my other arm. I love my scars.

  7. Never cut my wrist, but my shoulder has scars. When I started, thats how I chose to deal with the hurt and pain I felt at the time. Now, it calms me down after something has riled me up more than Id like it to.
    If my friends knew there was a ‘now’, theyd freak, and be pissed. They think I stopped. I never did. Took a break for awhile, but never really stopped.

  8. I used to be a cutter, too.

    I’ve stopped, but there are times I still think about it.

    All my friends would freak if they knew I was still even THINKING of doing it..but especially if I did it.

  9. ive cut myself for 7 years. im almost 18 years old. to distract the emotional pain, and bring on the physical pain. and when thats over with i cut myself again

  10. I cut for a long time.

    The only thing that stopped me was when I blacked out and kept cutting.

    Because I cut so I could control the emotional pain. You don’t feel the physical pain so much when you’re doing it…

    I stopped when I couldn’t control the cutting anymore. But it doesn’t mean I don’t have times when I want to.

  11. HEY! Calm down.

    This person was being supportive, not tearing anyone down.

    You’re arguing with someone who is saying the same things you are.

    Chill out, stop projecting. Get some help, it’s obviously consumed you.

    You also don’t know what experience this person has with cutting, so get over yourself while you’re at it.

  12. That happened to me! They got me into a psychiatrist and therapy but it just made me feel I had to cut more.
    The I just learnt to hide my cuts better and no one noticed.

  13. I was self-abusive for 9 years. I’m only 15.
    I stopped two months ago.
    It’s been one of the hardest things I’ve ever done but the best thing you can do is find a friend to help you and find ways to distract yourself.
    It’s an addiction and one you can’t fight alone.
    I suggest “To Write Love On Her Arms”

  14. instead of cutting, i tried cutting my nails to points and scratching….it doesn’t leave the nasty marks, but hurts all the same. less self destructive.

  15. I cut myself for twelve years from the age of nine. I wish I had talked sooner. I thought everyone was out to judge me and became defensive and snapped at many when really people want to help but don’t understand anything about it and thus don’t know how to. It confuses people more because in a person’s mind that has never felt that compulsion it makes no sense and so it is easy to put it up for simply attention and I can understand that reaction.
    Seek help. It progresses and it does get worse. I have nerve damage in my left hand. I had three blood transfusions, I must have hit bone at least ten times and somehoe shrugged and thought to myself “it still isn’t enough” – I went to a gruelling Self Injury “rehabilitation” program for six months and nothing sank in. We lose perspective and it all starts out, most of the time, as scratches. It becomes dangerous and its an action we can become dependent on. Its not something that is even remotely easy to stop on your own and I know part of the fear of telling is that you might cause concern or worry to people you don’t want to – but it does get worse and someone will find out and their concern will be so much worse.
    I am hesitant over therapy but I would not dismiss it. I would suggest support groups – there is no obligation to speak and you are surrounded by people who you can relte to and that will not judge you. You need to learn to understand the emotions behind it that often are not as simple as we would like to think – a site that has helped me a lot is http://www.psyke.org – the people there are much more straight talking than on other forums which isn’t everyone’s cup of tea but I needed their down to earth and realistic approach without the romantisicm to realise what I was really doing.
    If people do question yo, don’t be defensive or angry – it only encourages the sterotype. Instead either have a sentence or two prepared for a light answer or smile and say it isn’t something you wish to discuss and bring up another topic.
    In hiding them better, you are only burying your feelings and secrets deeper in yourself.
    I wish you the best of luck.

  16. the site Cass mentioned is actually the site that gave me the strength and courage to stop (about 7 months cut free after 10 1/2 years of self-injury). it is comforting to see so many other people reaching out and telling their stories, their struggles, in such a raw and honest way, cutters helping cutters. this is not a small issue, its an undercover epidemic.
    but besides turning to anonymous cutters, family or close friends help too. find someone to confide in, even if you dont think theyll understand. set out a time to meet and tell them, say you need their support and love, and !!!let them ask questions!!! when ppl find out someone they love is hurting that much they are just as scared and confused as you are.

    well thats my shpeel for now, the site is http://www.psyke.org/ but some articals do contain some possible triggers. the site is generally really good with warning you before all links that have it.

    good luck to all of you, you cant truely stop until you know in your heart that you must.

  17. Sweetheart you don’t have to cut. I struggled with it too and your mom should be concerned. Know you are valuable. Know you are loved. You are holding so much inside that cutting is what you do to release feelings or the emotions inside. There are others ways and freedom from cutting! I believe you will get through this and be able to help other girls that face this struggle. Jesus loves you and He is there to love on you when your family isn’t. He thinks you are beautiful because He made you and it hurts Him to see you do this to yourself honey.

  18. All I have to say is I am in awe of your ability to speak with each other so freely and so kindly.I am researching this subject for graduate school, I have a friend who has cut for over 20 years and it gets worse. I am looking to learn more about how you manage to stop, what you do, your soothing techniques etc, if therapy has helped or meds…if any of you want to tell me your story, I will gaurd it with great care and respect. Feel free to post or e-mail me at [email protected]

    Thank you all for your honesty, I am not looking to “shrink” anyone but join you in your fight against what haunts you.


  19. I think a bunch of cutters giving each other advice on why they shouldn’t cut is pretty hypocritical. But I don’t blame any of you in the slightest bit. It’s hard to use your own advice. Just don’t give up.

  20. I have the same problem. It started when I was about 13 and I had to move because my parents divorced, on top of having an autistic violent brother. My mom would get so mad at me when she saw on my arms so I’ve pretty much tricked her into thinking that I’ve stopped. I’m 19 now and I still cut, only I’ve been cutting my thighs. At the pool and beach I wear shorts. My sister I think knew I cut at some point but is too stupid to realize why I never get completely naked. Plus I’m fat so I have a good excuse to not show my thighs.

    And sometimes I sit up late at night and just think how I won’t have to worry about my future if I kill myself. I’m almost 20, never had love, never been kissed. My friends don’t seem to care. Whatever.

  21. I just wrote you a long email…it got deleted when I tried to post…in short don’t give up…people do care…I care…feel free to email me…you could use some “good therapy” I might be able to help you find someone who has a clue where you live…email me…20 is waaaay too young to say goodbye to this world, it can only get better from here…friends can only help so much and remember, where there is life, there is hope…Debbie

  22. I cut, and I have to hide it because if anyone finds out then I will wish I wasn’t alive. I lied to my mom telling her that I would never cut again when she had found out last year that I cut. I totally wish I could just be open about it, but I can’t because of how I will be treated when people find out. UGH!

  23. I can’t handle when people say that you can just stop cutting. If you can good for you but it’s different for everyone.I’m sick and tired of people saying it is just the person who cuts fault if you care so much help recognize the freaking signs!

  24. im a cutter and its ridiculous people try and “understand” the addiction ive done drugs and drank and none of them were as hard to quit as cutting. people need to not judge and accept people hurt and this is how they hurtless if there was something you could do to numb or stop your pain wouldnt you? everyones in pain just not all the time, and somtimes its so trumendous that you cant deal with it alone or with someone else. im a cutter thats part of who i am but its not all of who i am just like a drunk is a drunk and a junkie a junkie but they are fathers daughters sons mothers friends and partners as well no one can be defined by one thing correctly. struggle and addictions are part of life. and everyones addiccted to something drugs, cutting, tattoos, caffine, biting their nails, shopping, talking, adrenaline, something and we shouldnt judge them for it try and help them sure but if they arent ready for help until they show signs of suicide or something totally severe like that let them cope in their own way. p.s i havent cute in 11 months and 20 days but ill always be a cutter its just part of who i am.

  25. and i my arms and legs and thighs are covered in scars some way worse than others but i dont care if people see them. i think theyre beautiful and all part of my story and my life and the pain and struggles ive been through and over came. i love every last one of my scars and i dont really care what people think of them anymore.

  26. Hey everybody, this realy pains me to see all these post trying to hide the scars. get help. after 3 hospitalizations and 2 failed atteps at suicide and 1 study on bipolar depression disorder at the mayo clinic.i finally quit the habit wanna now how? i found something i loved way more then my self, skateboarding whenever i got upset i went outside and did exactly that im 16 now and 2 years gone from
    cutting. Now i just find somthing you love more then you self somthing you just cant sea yourself without, wether it be a person,sport,pet etc,etc life is worth living just give it a chance

  27. I cut. I’ve been trying to stop but nothing relieves me as well as this. It’s an instant sense of peace. Someday I hope I can get past this.

  28. i cut for about 2 years. i managed to stop after i realised there are better ways of dealing with my emotions instead of being so self destructive. i get urges to do it sometimes but im mostly able to control them. it get better everyones heard it so many times but it does get so much better x

  29. Progman, congrats! Not surprised you exceeded MP. I dont know how anyone can not race a race, it would take a strong backbone, which I certainly dont have. Yeah, handhelds rule!!

  30. I am 19, almost 20, and I’ve been cutting for nearly 6 years. I read so many posts echoing each other, I don’t think mine is unique in any way either, except I’m shocked that so few, if any, address the damage you can do to someone who hurts themselves if you FORCE them to stop when they are not ready. Self harm is highly addictive and if forced to stop cold-turkey, the problem is going to come back, probably worse. Self harm is 1.)attention seeking behavior(not to be ignored, if you’re willing to hurt yourself to ask for help its obviously serious) 2.) A way to make yourself feel more in control, especially when you feel overwhelmed or challenged 3.) A way to deal with overwhelming emotions in a physical way. Not trying to categorize everyone, these are just the main categories. I’ve written numerous, extensively researched articles and papers to raise Self Harm Awareness. I’ve helped many people with self harm, depression, bipolar, and even suicidal intentions. I still have a problem, I think of cutting as much as a 130 yr old boy thinks of sex, but I’m doing better. I hid my problem from teachers, friends, and family for years. From my wrist to my shoulder there’s thick, long angry red scars against the white ones underneath, as well as my thigh with precise orderly lines of cuts as though I’d been keeping track of time. One of my main obstacles in getting my cutting under control was that a friend discovered my cuts and threatened to expose me if I didn’t stop. She had good intentions, but that stress of not having the option made me want it more

  31. Someone trying to stop, understand the urge will never go away. But you’re strength to say no grows everytime you do. Realizing you’ve made it 3 days without cutting may sound easy to some, but any progress is impressive. Don’t relapse over and over because you did once. These words come from a hypocrite, I still cut, but don’t let that take away from my words. I know its easy to justify it to yourself, or to let that mistake make you feel it doesn’t matter. It does. You made it as long as you could, try not to fall down that slope if you slip.

    To those wanting to help someone who self-harms, DO NOT FORCE THEM OUT OF THEIR COMFORT ZONE. But also never ignore the problem. Let them know you’re aware of what’s going on, that you’ve noticed and.care enough to ask them if they’re okay. Offer support, bit don’t force it on them. They’ll fight you, but at least they know they aren’t alone. Let them know about chatrooms or forums you think they might be interested in, but don’t be too pushy. Their comfort is key. Try to get them out of the house more, engaged in life.

  32. people always say “get help” for cutting, like it’s something we can just do. a lot of cutters, dont want to give it up. in our warped little minds, somehow, it helps us.

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