Post Secret Archive

no you wouldn’t. people will find another reason for you to hate themselves. so i think don’t bother hating yourself. it is not worth anything. it will NOT make you more attractive or successful. just unhappy.

I like myself more, People like me more, I’m happier, I finally feel confident. Best thing that ever happened to me.

Hey Skinny, sad isn’t it that your user name shows that you identity is mainly about being ‘skinny’. sad because if such a transient thing is your main identity…
research (not the greedy docs who are trying to create a fake obesity crisis) but real research proves that if you are genetically inclined to be fat then despite your insane dieting, scary weight loss plans etc will not last beyond 5 years!
do you REALLY like being friends with people who have started liking you more now that you are a lifeless Barbie Doll like in their hands. have you also changed your ideologies etc to fit in with such shallow friends. will you also leave your family members, your jobs, your pets, your favourite authors and anything and everything to ‘fit in’?
if not, then why go by their standards of beauty.
anyhow now that you have lost tonnes of weight you can also spend the rest of the life obsessively trying to maintain it and lead a rather unfulfilling life.
i do feel sorry for you but you know if you are an adult you can really CHOOSE to have better friends and a healthier life style.
wanting to be thin is not mentally or spiritually healthy. and physically healthy, that also is a doubtful thing.

LOL they’ don’t like me more because of how much better they think I look, they like me because of how much better I feel I look. I’ve had self esteem issues my whole life, and these insecurities just made me bitter and sad all the time. Now I finally feel confident in who I am and how I look, and this confidence has brought me much happiness. It’s easier for me to socialize and make friends, put myself out there without being all self concious. I’ve stopped dieting and started living more healthy, this new body is turnign out to be easy to maintain.

You can’t choose your genes but body weight is one thing you can almost control. It takes some work, but being fit has its benefits. With todays society I assume the author has much of the same issues as I did, so I’m just saying I know what shes talkign about.

and there is an obesity crisis.. lol Nandini

you obviously assume being fit and being thin are the same thing. what can possibly be said to you then.
it has been proven that genes are the factor that causes fatness or thinness in people. and yes there is no need to challenge genes to fit in the narrow asthetic requirements that society has. it is as ridiculous as darker skinned people wanting/needing/being forced to to be fairer because the society values and far more easily accepts the lighter skinned people.
having said this and all that i have said above, i am not denying the ‘benefits’ of fitting in. of course, your self esteem grows, because all your life you have seen people who are thin enjoying the attention, affection that you also wanted.of course now you can be a part of the poplura fashion and look even better.
but that is exactly my point, why force people to fit in…why make their lives miserable if they don’t fit in.
and perhaps you’d like to read this http://kateharding.net/but-dont-you-realize-fat-is-unhealthy/

skinny, i think you should ignore nandini…. because nandini is probably a slightly oversized person.
I understand what you are saying completely and I am a guy. I was fit all the way through high school. I played water polo and I swam and i played football. Then at the beginning of my final year i broke my leg. Because of the sports centered llifestyle i had, i used to eat alot. now lots of food + no exercise = gaining weight. so i gained weight. not alot, but enough that i would have a little bulge here or there etc. And even though other people didnt really care. I felt uncomfortable and insecure. And I found that I wasnt the same person I used to be. I disliked myself.
My Cast came off my leg and I didnt play as much sport as i had before, but i cut down on the food i ate and found a nice balance. I am now back to the weight I was before. I have my six pack back and I feel much more comfortable about who I am. And I can feel the mental and emotional change within me….
So dont let nandini get you down. There are only a few people who understand us!.

Have a GR8 day skinny!

Ha ha ha ha
SJRSA,
Nandini is not slightly (are you being polite, ROFL) overweight. she is rather over weight. but the question is OVER whose weight. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
sorry probably for you guys it is a life and death situation…being liked by people is probably the single most important thing in your life, so i should really refrain from patronising you poor dears.
yes, i like the way how you end your little note SJRSA tho…like YOU are the one who is victimised and are in a minority…are you serious.
people obsessed with how they look are a plenty!!! maybe you just need to be a little more observant? and er…the world is FULL of people who are judgemental of each other’s appearances to this extent that the poor secret poster feels that s/he will be worthy only if s/he were skinny…
actually come to think of s/he writes SUPER skinny. god, once you get on this trip of losing weight, you might as well never stop and never do. coz when you are not starving yourself or feverishly excercising, you are hating yourself anyway…so when does the madness ever stop.

see i have been skinny…attractive or not is a state of mind now. and i may add, MY state of mind…not random losers who might imagine that they can decide when i am hot or not.
and i have been fat and i feel smart, attractive and a person of value. yes it is a bit of struggle to know that you are an incredible person despite the false media images and insidious messages we are getting from each other, but darling let me tell you …it is SO worth it.
from a person contantly filled with self doubt and i dare say self loathing you just feel like a normal human being, just happy to be YOU. and it is such a wonderful place to be.
wish you guys experience this some day.
best of luck.

p.s your self victimisation in the last line is still cracking me up but i should really behave myself.

Nandini
I actually really respect and envy how you’ve been able to not let todays society compromise how you feel about yourself and your body. Good for you! Thats a pretty strong quality in a person, but what’s really not is how you feel the need to be SO condesending and rude to those of us who live in the modern world where alot of self confidence comes along with how other people see you. You’re getting pretty self richeous for someone who seems so independantly confident. Who are you trying to convince? I see where you’re coming from, but don’t feel the need to bash me and other people who are proud that other people – as well as ourselves – find us attractive. You’re being rude.
As far as that website you left us, I’m pretty sure there are thousands of credited websites with information on how obesity is infact a health concern. That link was the equivalent to a fat person’s pro ana page.
Congradulations though, really you should be proud, just don’t player hate on people that still care.

And yeah SJRSA it was the exact same thing with me once i quit gymnastics! lol i was just used to having this super metabolism haha now I just don’t let myself munch out on garbage, and i’m back to looking and feeling great Its so true – the confidence that comes along with it has made me a much happier person.

I feel the same way, but I’m to embarrassed to do anything to change it..

and @the people above.. grow the hell up. It’s his/her secret; not your battle grounds. and P.S skinny is probably fat and just wants to pick on people who have enough guts to admit it.

I’ve always wanted to be skinny. my friends say am skinny but i fell like not good enuff. mmy familly told me i have an eating disorder. I denied it.
Now I am on medication that includes weekly injections because my body is giving up on me. i know I am fighting a losing battle and one day I will i will die in my sleep. i wish that night was tonight. coz i cant stand the medicine anymore!!!!

i think i would too.
too bad i’ll never get to know….

So do i.

I was really skinny, my mom starved me on purpose. Now I love myself after gaining 30 pounds, and so does my boyfriend.

I believe sincerly that If I was skinny all my other problems wouldnt matter anymore.

I’m ‘skinny’ and hate it. It gives reasons for people to call you anorexic and Bulimic. I used to cry myself to sleep because of it.

you people crack me up

so do i…. i bet he’d love me 2

i’ve felt this way my whole high school life.
don’t give up on yourself. don’t focus on your weight or you’ll never get it off your mind.

This secret hits a little too close to home. I ended up becoming vegetarian just so I could eat less. After that I just ate enough to sustain myself. I was pretty happy entering high school because I had dropped from a size nine to a size five.us Then things took a downwards spiral that caused me to binges for awhile. I ended up being a size eleven after six months of my binges. Since then I’ve been fighting a battle between eating healthy or not eating at all.

sometimes i feel the exact same way.

It doesn’t work like this for everyone, for some people it even has the opposite effect, but for me, loosing weight was the best decision I ever made. Even with the vicious rumors and concerns that came along with it, it didn’t even bother me because now I am more confident than I ever have been. I have more fun with everything I do.

I used to be fat. I hated myself. My mother told me she would love me more if I was thin. I felt guys rejected me because I was fat. At 22, I lost a lot of weight. For a couple of years, my whole universe turned upside down. I was pretty, people liked me, approached me, admired me, complimented me, my parents were proud and not embarrassed anymore. For some months, I felt like prom queen. I glowed.

Then I realized that all my confidence resided on my looks, that my social worth was on my looks, that my “friends” were so because of my looks. I became an angry girl, someone who would disdain fat people because she felt they were lazy and should follow her lead. I looked healthy, but I starved myself. I thought about food all the time. I never cut myself any slack.

I ended up developing binge eating and getting back some of the weight. Again I noticed how people changed the way they approached me, how let down “they” felt. I would eat and eat and eat until it hurt so much that I had to cry, but never “allowed” myself to vomit because I felt I had done something so horrible that I had to pay for it. I am still trying to figure out why I did that.

Now, after making good friends, and some therapy, I feel much better. I am in my weight. I enjoy food. I eat well, but indulge myself sometimes without feeling guilty. I don’t kid myself that I am over food-weight-self-image issues, I think they will be with me forever. I can only hope that I can learn to deal with them as healthily as I can.

“The worries about your weight do not decrease no matter how much weight you lose. Rather, they grow. And the more you worry about your weight, the more you are willing to act on that worry…”

I think it’s important to warn you and anyone else who believes thin is the end-all, be-all of happiness that in this culture, it is extremely difficult to act on the desire to lose weight in a healthy manner:

“We know we need, and so we acquire and acquire and eat and eat, past the point of bodily fullness, trying to sate a greater need. Ashamed of this, we turn skeletons into goddesses and look to them as if they might teach us how to not need.”

“Denial of the flesh…is not only the obvious culmination of centuries of bizarre ideas about the dainty nature of women but also an active realization of religious and cultural ideals. And yet this is a culture where we seesaw madly, hair flying and eyes alight, between crazed and constant consumption, where the insatiable hunger is near-universal, as is the fanatical belief in the moral superiority of self-denial and self-control.”

We have been raised on on the idea that there is a quick fix for anything that goes wrong, and it is very much portrayed in our attitude towards food. Starving, diet pills, laxatives, etc. instead of being viewed as the dangerous methods of weight loss that they are, are now looked at as solutions. This has overshadowed the fact that a body needs to be fed. I spent four years with an eating disorder, trying to convince myself otherwise, and I was left with nothing but near-kidney failure and a completely distorted idea of who I was.

I didn’t believe that I was self-destructive, but one day I heard myself, with absolute sincerity, telling the concerned doctors that I didn’t care if I died. Based on my routine, they estimated that if I continued, I might make it for three more years. I didn’t cry or try to recover, because I was living for starving and if I couldn’t, then I didn’t want to live at all. Though I knew there had been a time of eating normally somewhere in my past, I didn’t remember it, and I had no idea how I would return:

“And so I went through the looking glass, stepped into the netherworld, where up is down and food is greed, where convex mirrors cover the walls, where death is honor and flesh is weak. It is ever so easy to go. Harder to find your way back.”

Anorexia was the only identity I had, and I couldn’t imagine going on without it.

“The awful paradox is that, to me it seemed that my emotional survival, my basic personal integrity, was dependent upon my mastery, if not total erasure, of myself.”

“I didn’t know in advance that I would never feel like I was good enough, like I was a “successful” eating disordered person until I was at death’s door. Actually, not even then.”

I believed that I needed to be thin to be happy. I didn’t gain much weight after recovery, and people tell me I’m thin, but I don’t concentrate on that. I eat, and I enjoy it, and I have found so much to live for. Therefore, I am happy. Thin has nothing to do with it.

All quotes came from Marya Hornbacher’s Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia. A lot of therapists advise against reading it if you have an unhealthy sense of body image, but I think it is the best, and quite frankly, the only book that depicts the truth about eating disorders. All messages via television, magazines, and general society aside, eating disorders are addictive, vicious physical representations of how much people can grow to hate themselves. They do not, in any way, indicate self-worth.

You could argue that we’re all different, that some of us might honestly determine our sense of value based on our weight. If that really is the only thing that you think will make you love yourself, then you will set aside your body’s needs and end up doing absolutely anything in order to achieve it. As your quiet aspiration grows into full-blown obsession, and it usually does, your standards grow. You chase the dragon, you never reach your objective, and then you die:

The body, many of us find to our great dismay, will always win. Either it will survive despite our best efforts, dealing a blow to our egotistical notion that we can control it, or it will die, making emotional survival utterly moot.”

Figure out what is actually nagging you. It takes a lot of rummaging around, but it’s there, and when you learn to approach your problems in a realistic, sustainable way, then you will love yourself.

Love for oneself takes more audacity than Western society wants us to believe. When you finally do, it feels like a revolution.

Agreed

Skinny= Happy

you aren’t alone

I thought that too. but i was wrong

I would kill for someone elses metabolism. I eat constantly. I always
have Fatty foods. I almost continued my own Super-Size me. I
Have friends who always work out. I never have. I have less than 90
pounds on me. I have only been alive for fourteen years. I don’t have abs
I have ribs. I can’t be told apart from the starving ethiopian children. I hide
my body sometimes so they don’t see me like this. I ware long sleeve in summer.
I hate being skinny. Weight can always be managed, along with the endless other
qualities of your life. But the things that can’t be? You have to learn to live with
them. Unless you’d decide to change it. I’m now 15 and weigh 134!!

i feel the exact same way. I have been dealing with my weight ever since i was little and nothing has changed or gotten better. I do believe that if i lost the weight and were thin, then i would be happier. I think i would be a lot more confident in myself and my self esteem would increase. I also feel that my anxiety would decrease. It’s hard being fat. It really is. It’s even harder to lose the fat. I’ve tried numerous times but i can never seem to keep it off. It effects my everyday life. It also makes me feel like i am not good enough and not worthy of love. It’s difficult to find a guy who can accept me for me, curves and all. I just feel like there is no one out there. I think if i lost the weight and were thinner i would be liked and more accepted. And i’m not saying that if I lost the weight and became thin everything would be perfect and I wouldn’t have any problems at all because it’s not true. I would have problem regardless, everyone does, we’re human. but i do feel like it would make me feel better about myself and improve my life.

If only it weren’t so difficult :/

I often feel like this
I feel like if I was skinny everything would be ok but then I think about it and realise I’d always find some other fault

I wish I had an eating disorder.

I love myself more being fat than I ever did trying to be skinny.

I’ve never hated myself so much as when I weight 7st.

Hey if you wanna be skinny i say Go Girl! It’s her choice haterz,,if she wants to be chosen by ana then she is gifted.

stay strong,,stay skinny

xx

I thought that as well, well i actually still do, however i was anorexic a few years ago, and you just keep thinking that way. I ended up becoming reclusive and refusing to see my friends. I realised and still have to keep telling myself these days that it is actually company and friendship that makes me love myself. Because if someone else can love me that i trust, i trust their love to love myself.

ive been super skinny my whole life…i wish more then anything i could be just a average sized girl..Everyone thinks i have a eating disorder..but i dont..i just cant gain weight..im 5’8..the most ive ever weighed is 110..those few weeks were the happiest ive ever been with my self…it bothers me when my friends who are your average sized female complain about being fat and talk about how they wish they could be my size..i just wish they could see how beautiful they really are.

i think what she means is she wants to be normal and comfortable in her own skin.. some people don’t like to stand out.. and i know it’s wrong but most people judge another by how they look.. i know i hate when people stare at my stretch marks when i have a t-shirt on just because it’s a nice day outside.. i know when people comment on sites like this they will say the right things.. but TRUTH.. if you seen a over weight girl you know you would take another look and miss the skinny girl pass right in front of her.. stop being so fake people.. just be truthful with your own self.. hopefully there our pure hearted people out there.. haven’t meet one yet.. my search continues..

i think this too, but the only thing that ever happens is me getting more and more fat, which means i hate myself more and more

I was happiest when I was a size 3! I know that may not be feasable anymore, but I am losing weight and it’s making me very happy.